Bittersweet tune.

Even you smile has become prudent.

You can’t stand still; I have lost you in the movement. I promised to myself when I catch you I am going to reveal my soul. Tell my story and beg for an unconditional understanding.

And then I see you coming, smiling, beaming…I drop my eyes and body becomes leafless tree. Where is the courage which was just within me?

And when you leave, I watch you walking through my innermost remorse. I know you walk towards love and I am not the love, I am just a girl who wants to be loved. 

Agnes.

I don't know why I go the way down by the riverside.

It’s rain being loud outside, indelicate stranger who makes the stillness become intimate with its cold metal melody against the windowsill.

He knows I am going to forgive every feeling sowed by him. 

Inexplicable sorrow, because he doesn’t play his tune just for me, mysterious desire to slake my thirst for him never being enough, embracing serenity.

He fills my cup with a hot chocolate and puts the rug around my shoulders. 

The smell of never – fading trust ruffles ocean of longing. 

He switches off the TV channel and makes me listen. 

He melts my prejudice with the charm and doesn’t ask for the answers. 

Most importantly he doesn’t make me lie.

…

His presence is so real, so royal and so simple that I forget…I am not the only one he is on stage for…

Agnes.  

Sleepless nights with hearty laughter.

Once upon a time …oh, well. Every day of my life I am dealing with the same sort of problems, what to do, what to eat, what to wear etc. and none of it doesn’t make any great changes...

And then…after struggling and trying, retrying…I zip my thoughts together, put them on the plate and play as with an unserviceable meal.

Painfully the plate is this blog and the meal - that’s me, my friend. 

Agnes.